How Pare Dating Works

From application to your first date, we handle the details so you can focus on genuine connection. Here's exactly how it works.

Your Journey to Meaningful Connection

1

Apply & Get Approved

Submit a 2-minute application with your basic info. We run a criminal background check, verify your ID, and confirm your photos match. Approval typically takes 24-48 hours.

  • Criminal background check for violent crimes, sex offenses, and fraud
  • Government ID verification
  • Live photo verification
2

Build Your Profile with Your Concierge

Once approved, you're paired with a personal concierge who helps you create your profile, choose photos, and set your preferences (deal breakers, age range, what you're looking for).

  • One-on-one profile help (photos, bio, what makes you unique)
  • Set deal breakers and preferences (kids, smoking, distance, etc.)
  • Define your ideal first date (coffee, dinner, activities you enjoy)
3

Receive Curated Matches

We send you 3-5 curated matches per week based on your preferences. Every match is verified, background-checked, and meets your criteria. No endless swiping.

  • Quality over quantity—only compatible, verified members
  • See why we think you'll connect
4

Invite or Pass

Review each match's profile and availability. Interested? Invite them out. Not feeling it? Pass and move on. When both people say yes, your concierge coordinates the date.

  • No texting before meeting—just a simple yes or no
  • Both people must be interested before a date is planned
5

Meet in Person

Your concierge plans everything—venue, timing, logistics. You meet without weeks of texting buildup. After the date, provide feedback. If both people want to continue, messaging unlocks.

  • We handle venue suggestions and coordination
  • Post-date feedback required (confidential)
  • Messaging unlocks after first date if both want to continue

What Makes Pare Different

We Screen Everyone

Unlike mainstream apps where anyone can join, we verify identity and conduct criminal background checks on 100% of members. If you don't pass, you can't join. Period.

Personal Concierge Support

You're not alone. Your concierge helps with profile creation, date planning, outfit advice, and gracefully handling awkward situations. Think of it as having a dating coach in your corner.

No Endless Swiping

We curate matches for you based on compatibility. You see quality over quantity—typically 3-5 matches per week who actually meet your criteria and are serious about dating.

Accountability Built In

Post-date feedback and our no-ghosting policy mean everyone is respectful and accountable. People who ghost or don't show up face consequences—unlike other apps where bad behavior is ignored.

Common Questions About the Process

How long does the background check take?

Typically 24-48 hours. We'll email you once you're approved. If there are any issues or delays, our team will reach out directly.

What if I don't pass the background check?

If you don't pass the background check due to disqualifying criminal convictions, we'll notify you and you won't be able to join Pare. This protects our community and ensures everyone's safety.

How much does it cost?

Pare costs $120/month, which includes background checks, ID verification, curated matches, and personal concierge support.

Can I pause my membership?

Yes. If you meet someone and want to see where it goes, you can pause your membership. Unpause anytime if things don't work out.

How many matches will I get per week?

Typically 3-5 curated matches per week. We focus on quality over quantity. Every match is verified, in your area, and meets your stated preferences.

Ready to Start?

Apply in 2 minutes. Background check included. Meet verified singles over 40.

Get Started Now

Background check included • Personal concierge support